Mommy is sick….. I pray for your eye to recover 100%.

Excuse me for my long absence and my apologies for those following me.  It has been an eventful 2016 for me.   Lots had happened, with some incidents leaving permanent damage physically and some emotionally.  I managed to pull through 2016 with GOD’s saving grace, the love of my husband, sons and support of family members.  I was provided a chance to rethink my priorities, and questioned myself on what is important to me.

I can’t feel my face!

It started in the morning during late May 2016.  I went in to work feeling unwell. Within 5 minutes after I stepped into the office, my right eye was dropping to a close and I can’t control my eyelid to open it up. My right cheek started to feel strange too, there seems to be a numbing sensation that was enough to set me panicking.

The immediate thought I had was “Am I going to suffer a stroke?

I left work without any hesitation and admitted myself into A&E.  I was kept in the observation ward and was treated as a priority case. For the next 4 hours the doctor run loads of blood test, went for an X-ray and MRI to rule out stroked.  Fortunately, and probably unfortunately, they detected a virus infection from my blood test results that explained the symptoms.  They confirmed it was Bell Palsy.

What is Bell’s palsy?

Bell’s palsy is a paralysis or weakness of the muscles on one side of your face. Damage to the facial nerve that controls muscles on one side of the face causes that side of your face to droop . The nerve damage may also affect your sense of taste and how you make tears and saliva. This condition comes on suddenly, often overnight, and usually gets better on its own within a few weeks.
Bell’s palsy is not the result of a stroke or a transient ischemic attack (TIA). While stroke and TIA can cause facial paralysis, there is no link between Bell’s palsy and either of these conditions. But sudden weakness that occurs on one side of your face should be checked by a doctor right away to rule out these more serious causes.”
http://www.webmd.com/brain/tc/bells-palsy-topic-overview#1iiIt 

Relief!!!

It definitely was a great sign of relief for me.  I was familiar with Bell Palsy as my mom had this condition 7 years back.  I knew what needed to be done to get myself treated.  The race is  against time

Things never go the way you plan.

Things went on fine for a couple of days after treatment. Then I started having problem with my vision.  My right vision started to blur and I could hardly see at night. I was referred to an eye specialist immediately by my neurologist.  Test results showed that there is a water growth in the middle of my eye that causing the obstruction of my vision,  they termed it Central serous retinopathy (CSR).  Apparently, I do not take well to steroid and it was the side effect the medication to cure Bell Palsy.

A photographic scan below illustrate how the water can impact my visual and the gradual move of the water downwards.  The cross section photos showed the gap caused by the water affecting my vision.  The gap finally closed up after 3 months and we ruled out the need for laser surgery to rid the water.


L &  L – Love and Lessons

The journey to recovery from Bell Palsy was both weary in body and spirit for me.  What I have learnt from this experience was that ultimately, it was family that cared and worried about you the most.  My oldest rascal was extremely concerned when he saw my face paralysis.  He asked me almost every day when I will get better.  He was also unusually quiet when he went about his daily activities. He hushed his younger brother a lot, telling him that mommy needs to rest when he gets too playful.  I was very touched by his actions and more so when he told me quietly one day, “Mommy, I pray everyday to GOD for your eyes to recover 100%”.

This sentence alone has provided me the strength and will to get well.  I am grateful that my family will always be there for me.  My aged Dad that was helping me to care for my boys so that I can get sufficient rest.  I am grateful that Jesus is always watching over me.  The combination of both prayers and family love is good enough medication as any doctor’s prescription.

“It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”

Deuteronomy 31:8
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Creative Discipline, learn as they grow

sibling rivalry [noun]:  competition between siblings especially for the attention, affection, and approval of their parents.

 

Me Time 

I did not give much thought when the boys started to fight over little things like wanting to hold only my right hand.  Shoving each other over sitting on my right. Wanting to be the first to be bath and dressed by me.  I was so overwhelmed handling their fights that it did not dawn on me that the sibling’s rivalry has begun.

Being a modern working mom, I constantly reminded myself to devote whatever precious time I have to the both of them.  Fair and firm in answering their demands right down to the choice of gifts purchased. Apparently, this was not sufficient.

Things started to get competitive when they demanded the “ME” time.

Ethan: “You have to love ME more than Elijah!”.

Elijah:”You don’t love ME.  I want you to sleep beside ME

After a few days of unreasonable demand, I learned.

When the competition starts again (usually around bedtime), I went “Ethan! who do you love more?  Dad or Me? Same? NO!  I want you to love ME more!”  That stops all demands and brought a smile to Ethan’s face. He finally got the message.

And to Elijah, I repeated his exact words lying beside him, “You don’t love me, you didn’t hug me!” Hearing the same tone and accusation from me, he went “Ya! I love you and gave me a big hug”  No further accusation from him after 3 rounds of mimicking him.

The Fights

Being inexperience, I sorted out their daily fights base on instinct and whatever creative ideas I can think of.

Fight 1:  Since Ethan is left handed and Elijah is right, I had them gave me the other hand to hold on to.  They were comfortable with this arrangement as their dominant hand were free and they do not feel constraint in any way.  One fight down.

Fight 2:  As for bath fights? I had them both in the bath at the same time and suggested that they soap each other and have bubbles fun.  It turns out to be more fun this way and actually cultivate responsibility and bonding between brothers.

Fight 3:  Fighting over who gets to consume their vitamin first, I prepared a choice of two – cod liver oil and immunped – and had them take turns being first to consume one of the two vitamins.  Thus, they are both first.  Not the most ideal solution but the boys seems to buy the reasoning.  Teaching them to look at things from a different perceptive.

notes for parents: Ethan’s immune system has always been weaker than the average kids and his Pediatrician has recommended immunped on top of the traditional ‘Scotts Cod Liver Oil’ to help with the cold he is always catching. For him, it works wonders.

Scotts_5219022_F
Scott’s Cod Liver Oil – contains Omega 3, Vitamin A, D & Calcium
immunped-262x262
Immunped -great with Zinc & Vitamin C

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Creative Discipline

Monter Ethan
Ethan wanted spiky hair with one eye

I came across a post by, ‘it’s always Autumn on Pinterest and used her free templates of felt monsters. Wah-la!!! Success! Not only was it easy to use, the option to mix and match is endless. I was not confident of my crafting skills and decided to try out one as a sample when I was found out by Ethan.  He wanted spiky hair monster with only a button for the eye and the combination was absolutely adorable.  Elijah was immediately fascinated by it and wanted it for himself when he saw the finished product.  At 4 years old, he did not understand that his felt monster was work-in-progress.  All he felt was being forgotten by mommy “How about me? Why I don’t have one? The sadness he expressed tugged at my heartstrings and I had to repeatedly assure him that I am working on it.

It did not register initially and he was all up in arms snatching his brother’s felt monster “It’s MINE!!!” and Ethan would respond in the same manner.  I had to convince Ethan to lend it to Elijah for a moment to cool him down before reasoning with him.  Fortunately, for me Ethan was cooperative.

Monster Elijah
Elijah wanted sharp teeth with a heart

Once Elijah had calmed down, I showed him the variety of felt monster patterns and allowed him to choose the one he likes.  He was delighted and made the decision on the colour of the felt to the buttons for the eyes.  He also asked for ‘sharp teeth’ and a heart for his monster.  All ended well and each has their own personal monster to play with.

I thus realised that to follow your mother instinct and use of creative play are of great help.  At tense moments, it brings smiles and laughter when at a deadlock in an argument you are having with the kids.  Many times, it also helped them realise how unreasonable they have been when you mimic them.  It saves a lot of energy trying to explain or even the urge to disciple them.

Every day is never dull living up to the challenging Ethan and Elijah throw at me.

Source: **mix-n-match felt monster PDF sewing patterns– It’s always Autumn